http://www.bible.ca/pre-date-setters.htm

this page is awesome.....the website is a typical uber-evangelical chick tract reading website, but this page was cool :)

edit: look whats supposed to happen in 2047 :D

also, this one

http://www.sullivan-county.com/news/mine/jazz.htm

Ah yes those people, one thing I've noticed is that you need a good dose of christian brainwashing and retardation before you start to believe that shit, cuz no one can go from being a normal person to believing that some guy that has sex with 12 year olds is the Christ reborn, you need to be part of moderate christian community, then a more fanatical one and then you go into a cult, that's how it works.

So really religion is a gateway drug to all sorts of shit. To be honest, religion only becomes a problem when people actually start to take it seriously.

The world ends whenever I die!

That's funny. Plus, I now have a great question to ask the Jehovah's Witnesses when they come to my house. How many times has your church falsely predicted the world would end? about 10, well, that seems to me that you must me making up shit and I just can't trust anything your religious leaders say.

Oh, you give them the time of day...

I slam the door directly in their faces.  One lady came early monday morning a few months ago, and I just shut the door in her face.  I took the booklet and then slammed the door.  Then went back to sleep.

2047... World will end when What??? Did I read that right???

Rainbow coloured astro Lemurs from space will beat us all to death with burritos???

WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!

KIDS, THIS IS WHAT DRUGS DO!!!

Well, we all know that if an asteroid is on its way, Bruce Willis will be able to single handedly bring it down.

Other than that, we're screwed

There is actually a jehovah's witness on this site you can ask, name escapes me at the moment. Typically if you ask them a question they can't answer they smile politely, say they'll do research, then return with a magazine or book printed by the watchtower and tract society (the head of their religion) that vaguely discusses your question, and then repeat whatever the book or magazine says, and if you persist then they just don't come back because your heart condition isn't right (it requires great humility to accept the teaching of god).

While they've predicted the "end" a few times and been wrong (not 10 times, though but a few times), they either say "oops" and/or readjust their thinking on the matter, re-intepret the scriptures, and move on. They've wised up though and stopped predicting an actual date or concrete timeline and just say that it is just around the corner, almost here, any day now the great tribulation will start and then armageddon, not yet, but almost. That way it can perpetually keep them waiting without ever disappointing. Much smarter than picking an actual date or saying now is the time.

According to The Church of !BLAIR!, the human race will probably be terminated at 3:28 AM (Soho, England time) 2047, SEP. 14!. The church teaches, with tongue firmly in cheek, that if the human race does not discard their plastic conformity, then the Gods will withdraw their protection. The Gods don't want us to worship them; they don't want sacrifices or even offerings. They just want us to rid itself of our excessive "Normalcy". At that point, Astro-Lemurs (extra-terrestrials similar in shape to lemurs, but with rainbow colored bodies) will attack the entire human race and beat them to death with gigantic burritos. You have been warned.

Now this is a prediction I can get behind.  I wonder if they'll be handing out burritos so everyone can get in on the action.

what kind of burritos I wonder. I need to ask them some questions.