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Forums - General - Do you wipe standing or sitting?

 

How do you wipe?

Standing 231 44.25%
 
Sitting 290 55.56%
 
Total:521
brendude13 on 21 September 2013
Jay520 said:
I've always been a sitting man myself. My dad was a sitting man. His dad was a sitting man, and so on. I've tried standing one time, and for the entire day, my buttocks region felt crusty. I had to dump my underwear, pants, my shirt, and my hat because they were stained with fecal residue

It's actually been scientifically proven by scientists that wiping while standing is the objectively inferior alternative. The reason is because when you stand, your ass cheeks close themselves again, causing residue to be smushed inside. When this happens, approximately 20% of the fecal matter is absorbed into the buttocks, and can only be removed via surgery. If surgery doesn't occur immediately, then the feces will be there forever; it will become a part of you. It's been estimated that the average stander is 15% full of shit, as a result.

Haven't you told us this story before?



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enditall727 on 21 September 2013
PDF said:
enditall727 said:
PDF said:

I know, Im thinking the same thing.  My mind is blown.  I once walked in on a guy standing on accident and I always thought it was wierd.  The incidnet scarred me for a while.

Only certain situations would call for standing.   In general standing would just make it harder to get where you need to clean.  You don,t want your ass cheeks messing things up on those really dirty clean ups.

Sit an lean forward, unless its a really nasty toilet and you need to hover.

 

This is more huge when I found out majority of peopel pee in the shower, i always thought it was the minority who did that.   I am also curious because me and my friends have discussed this.  When using the toilet paper do you fold it for extra strenght or just bunch in all together?


You mean to tell me that you have never pissed in the shower? So what do you do when you have to piss in the middle of taking a shower? You mean to tell me that you actually hold it in and wait until you get out to piss?

 

I REFUSE to believe that. I dont think there is a man on this planet who doesn't piss in the shower

I have never pissed in the shower.  That I can promise you, the idea of using my bathing area as a toilet is incredibly gross to me.  My biggest issue is that so many people live with roomates, or family where people share showers.  I do not want anyone peeing in my shower.  Its just disgusting.

Habit has caused me to take a piss before every shower.  So I never run into that problem.


Well you never know your future kids might end up pissing all over that bitch lol

what you dont know will never hurt you

 

Before getting in the shower, if i feel that i need to piss then i will piss before getting in BUT if i'm already in and i have to piss then i'm going to piss lol. I'll be damned if i'm going to hold it in until i step out. Just aim right at that little drainage hole.

 

Just answer this, if you just stepped in the shower and you feel that you have to piss 45 seconds in, what do you do?



enditall727 on 21 September 2013
Kemsus said:

just to clarify it is my experience that american toilets and european toilets are not actually the same, european toilets have a much lower water level and compared to the american toilets

 

the one on the left is an american toilet which operates with suction, while the one on the left is a european toilet which operates with water pressure.

i assume most of those who answered sitting will turn out to be non-americans, i might also be completely wrong.


I dont think i would be able to sit on a Euro toilet. It has too much depth.

 

There's waaaayyyy too much space. I would be too paranoid and would probably think that something was under there and like a hand would try and grab me from out the toilet



enditall727 on 21 September 2013
Jay520 said:
I've always been a sitting man myself. My dad was a sitting man. His dad was a sitting man, and so on. I've tried standing one time, and for the entire day, my buttocks region felt crusty. I had to dump my underwear, pants, my shirt, and my hat because they were stained with fecal residue (which is weird because my hat was in the other room when I was in the bathroom).

It's actually been scientifically proven by scientists that wiping while standing is the objectively inferior alternative. The reason is because when you stand, your ass cheeks close themselves again, causing residue to be smushed inside. When this happens, approximately 20% of the fecal matter is absorbed into the buttocks, and can only be removed via surgery. If surgery doesn't occur immediately, then the feces will be there forever; it will become a part of you. It's been estimated that the average stander is 15% full of shit, as a result.


I'll be damned!

 

They must not know how to wipe then.

 

I wouldn't give a damn what any of those scientist say. My ass is off of that toilet seat when wiping! I get SQUEAKY clean each and everytime!



Jay520 on 21 September 2013
brendude13 said:
Jay520 said:
I've always been a sitting man myself. My dad was a sitting man. His dad was a sitting man, and so on. I've tried standing one time, and for the entire day, my buttocks region felt crusty. I had to dump my underwear, pants, my shirt, and my hat because they were stained with fecal residue

It's actually been scientifically proven by scientists that wiping while standing is the objectively inferior alternative. The reason is because when you stand, your ass cheeks close themselves again, causing residue to be smushed inside. When this happens, approximately 20% of the fecal matter is absorbed into the buttocks, and can only be removed via surgery. If surgery doesn't occur immediately, then the feces will be there forever; it will become a part of you. It's been estimated that the average stander is 15% full of shit, as a result.

Haven't you told us this story before?



Not sure. I doubt it though.

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Jay520 on 21 September 2013
enditall727 said:
Jay520 said:
I've always been a sitting man myself. My dad was a sitting man. His dad was a sitting man, and so on. I've tried standing one time, and for the entire day, my buttocks region felt crusty. I had to dump my underwear, pants, my shirt, and my hat because they were stained with fecal residue (which is weird because my hat was in the other room when I was in the bathroom).

It's actually been scientifically proven by scientists that wiping while standing is the objectively inferior alternative. The reason is because when you stand, your ass cheeks close themselves again, causing residue to be smushed inside. When this happens, approximately 20% of the fecal matter is absorbed into the buttocks, and can only be removed via surgery. If surgery doesn't occur immediately, then the feces will be there forever; it will become a part of you. It's been estimated that the average stander is 15% full of shit, as a result.


I'll be damned!

 

They must not know how to wipe then.

 

I wouldn't give a damn what any of those scientist say. My ass is off of that toilet seat when wiping! I get SQUEAKY clean each and everytime!



I advise you to seek an experienced professional to examine your anus. Just to be safe.

enditall727 on 21 September 2013
Jay520 said:
enditall727 said:
Jay520 said:
I've always been a sitting man myself. My dad was a sitting man. His dad was a sitting man, and so on. I've tried standing one time, and for the entire day, my buttocks region felt crusty. I had to dump my underwear, pants, my shirt, and my hat because they were stained with fecal residue (which is weird because my hat was in the other room when I was in the bathroom).

It's actually been scientifically proven by scientists that wiping while standing is the objectively inferior alternative. The reason is because when you stand, your ass cheeks close themselves again, causing residue to be smushed inside. When this happens, approximately 20% of the fecal matter is absorbed into the buttocks, and can only be removed via surgery. If surgery doesn't occur immediately, then the feces will be there forever; it will become a part of you. It's been estimated that the average stander is 15% full of shit, as a result.


I'll be damned!

 

They must not know how to wipe then.

 

I wouldn't give a damn what any of those scientist say. My ass is off of that toilet seat when wiping! I get SQUEAKY clean each and everytime!


I advise you to seek an experienced professional to examine your anus. Just to be safe.


Lol

 

NOBODY will be looking at my ass



Leadified on 21 September 2013

Sitting, until this thread I never heard of anyone doing it standing. Then again I don't really ask people how they wipe their ass.



Kemsus on 21 September 2013
pbroy said:
Kemsus said:

just to clarify it is my experience that american toilets and european toilets are not actually the same, european toilets have a much lower water level and compared to the american toilets

 

the one on the left is an american toilet which operates with suction, while the one on the left is a european toilet which operates with water pressure.

i assume most of those who answered sitting will turn out to be non-americans, i might also be completely wrong.


So what is the one on the right?


i have now edited my post i meant the one on the right is a european one



avais1993 on 21 September 2013

I went Pakistan once and had to shit in one of them other toilets that resembles a hole in the ground, do you know how awkward it is to have a shit crouching down whilst wearing jeans, them lot must have super powerful leg strength.

Anyways to answer the question, doesn't everybody sit?



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