I have a question on backing up my PS3 when i plug in my hard drive and then go to backup utility it won't start backing up it just goes to a screen that says connect to destination media server and the option O to cancel. Can someone help me please.

Is your external HD formatted for FAT32? If not, the PS3 won't recognize it. If this is the case, google FAT32 formatting programs ( Compuapps Swiss Knife is what I used). The program should walk you through the formatting process. After the formatting is complete you should have no problems.
Hope this helps!

need to have it connected media server it's to ps3 to ps3 transfer

My PS3 is so Phat that when I back it up it goes "Beep, beep, beep, beep"!

LOL!

This.  Your hard drive must be formatted to Fat32 to be recognized.  I had the same issue and had to reformat