Skipping straight from the OP without reading any posts:
I'm a black male with a teenage daughter. I want her to grow up thinking that there's nothing she can't do or be of she makes the right decisions. On that same note, we live in a real world. There are things that have happened and it's okay for history to reflect that. If it happened, it happened. I personally hate being pandered to. It disgusts me. If I were a woman, I don't think I'd be too keen on that either. Don't project your fantasy on me because you think that's what I want to see. Tell the story you want to tell with the characters you want to use.
There are physical differences between men and women. Generally speaking, we have different strengths. We have different weaknesses. Writing a story where a woman is better at being a man feels akin to writing a story where a fish is better at being a lion than a real lion.
