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SpokenTruth said:
Apparently Nintendo went to Magus' house, stole all of his Wii U games and held his dog at gunpoint until he bought a Switch and the ported games. They also left the toilet seat up, left the milk out on the counter and spoiled he ending of his favorite TV show.

Oh, and they also put a device on his head that removed all the enjoyment he experienced playing Wii U games.

Switch owners should not be enjoying those games, goddamnit! Mwuahhh!