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ReimTime said:
A neckbeard atheist intellectual tips his fedora into battle; wielding a sharp mind, cutting reason and a walmart swordcane. Moves include "decapitalize 'God'", "correct grammar", and the final smash: "white knight: protecting princess Zelda and Peach from Chad's like Ike and Ryu". Although there is a coopdown aptly named "friend zone"

Console fanboy rolls into smash! Using strawman arguments, personal insults and using personal opinions as facts. Once console fanboy takes enough hit points, prepare yourself for the special move: claiming that you are the one who is salty

Anita Sarqueersan whines her way into the male-dominated abuse simulator! If her "hot air" attack doesn't make you rage quit, prepare to face well known moves like "Smash ceiling" and "wage slap"

You forgot to add bi-spectacle, balding and overweight for the appearance of the neckbeard atheist.