Oh, go on, then. 
1. How many Nintendo-published games do you own?
A) Less than 100.
2. What's Nintendo's rank in your personal list of best console manufacturers of all time?
A) First.
3. If given the opportunity, would you spit on a competitor's system?
B) Probably.
4. If somebody criticizes Nintendo on the internet, how do you react?
A) I try to politely correct the misguided person.
5. Have you ever criticized Nintendo yourself?
A) Only when it was justified.
6. If Nintendo releases a bad game, what do you do?
B) I wait for a price drop or don't buy it at all.
7. Have you ever gotten into a fight with another Nintendo fan?
A) Yes, because his name was Z... oh scratch that. C) Yes, but I can't remember why.
8. What do you think about third party games?
B) Some of them are quite good.
9. If RolStoppable quotes or addresses you in a thread, how do you feel?
A) I feel honored that he humors my presence.
10. Have you answered all questions truthfully?
C) Does it really matter? It's probably all about question 9 anyway.
Lastly, write down the most important reason why you think that you are a cool Nintendo fan.
I increased Wii U sales by 3 units just by giving a gamepad to my kids' friends and walking out of the room - and these were kids of that age where apparently it's more cool to own a powerful system and shout obscenities while playing colourless games online.
I doubt that makes me a cool Nintendo fan but THEY think I'm cool because I can still beat them at Smash. 
