No.
You mention new owners have nothing to look forward which I feel is not even important. New WiiU owners have the whole catalog of true quality games to experience when PS4/X1 are just starting to form theirs. I personally have been on the fence for months whether to buy WiiU, its catalog is simply supreme at the moment. I just don't have time for another console, I'm already struggling to find enough time for PS4 and Vita.
I cannot imagine toilet-free life.
Kebabs have a unique attribute compared to other consumables. To unlock this effect you need to wolf down a big ass kebab really fast, like under 10 minutes or so and wait for the effect to kick in. If done correctly your movements should feel unbelievably heavy to the point where you literally cannot move at all.
-Downtown Alanya Kebab magazine issue no.198
