Ok, a few things:
Loving this one
"Should not be used to pose simple questions."
For checking possible dupe threads, "hot topics" is probably one of the worst places to look. Older or less popular threads are easily buried in that mess. So my suggestion is using "latest threads" and go through at least the last 50 entries. That way almost all dupe threads would be eliminated. This shouldn't be hurdle. After all threads shouldn't be made lightly and it's not too much to ask to really check before posting.
Also the phrase "lock if duplicate" should be banned. This sentence only means 2 things: Either the OP was too lazy to look properly or that he has looked properly. In the latter case such note wouldn't be necessary because OP can claim with confidence that it's probably not a dupe.
This I don't like.
"Posts that are clearly a reply or a response to a thread should be just that, a post. Threads should not be a reply, a response, or a retaliation to another thread. Keep related discussion in the appropriate thread."
Response threads are always so much fun. That's where most of the VGC memes come from:)
If you demand respect or gratitude for your volunteer work, you're doing volunteering wrong.
