I need advice on what to do with my life, Im going through a tough time

[SamuelRSmith]

First, don't hate on your cousin. Supporting someone emotionally can be a big drain, and maybe he can't handle it any more. He was a good person to help you for all those years, most people wouldn't tolerate a few days.

In terms of how to improve your situation: if you do go to college, and don't know what to study yet, seriously consider Computer Science, it will be beneficial to you in a lot of ways. Namely, it's a great degree for a career, and it's a highly-demanded skill world-wide, meaning that if you ever want to move city, state, or even country, a CS degree (provided you worked hard, got good grades, and worked at some decent internships) is a fantastic tool for such a move. I've already spent a year in Hong Kong, and I had options to work in The Netherlands and South Africa, hopefully next year I'll be moving to California, if I play my cards right.

Outside of career and visa opportunities, you'll find that in a Computer Science degree you'll find many people in similar situations to you: perhaps a little socially awkward, not many friends. So long as you stick your neck out - just a little bit - you will develop social groups. There will be societies at your uni for everything you can think of - including video games, and those are essentially developed to help people make friends.

The only other piece of advice I can give you is: get a job. A shitty-part time job while you study. Maybe only 10-15 hours a week. Fast food joints are great because of their flexible hours and young work force (meaning most of your colleagues will be similar age to you). Working in a real, productive, job can do wonders for your feelings of personal worth, and they will give you extra motivation in the rest of your life.

I'm currently back at McDonald's while I finish the last year of my CS degree. I love my job, you really feel like you've spent a good day working, the time flies, and you're making people's lives better by serving them something they want. Out of my friends at Uni, I'm also one of the very few who are financially independent from my parents, that in itself is a fantastic feeling.

What you fundamentally need to do, though, is stop relying on others for emotional support, and you need to develop motivation. If you honestly try this for a few months, and you don't see any improvement in your emotional stability, you may be suffering from depression and it might be a good time to see a doctor for some medical help.