True story: I was suicidal back in 1995. I'd already had my spot picked out where I was going to die and everything. I said, "Before I go, I want to see the new Batman movie". Batman Forever was months away, at the time. I saw the images of Val Kilmer looking like a pretty kick-ass Batman, what appeared to be a pretty cool origin of Robin (his red and green costume was his circus attire), and it had Jim Carrey in it. I would see this movie and die a satisfied teenager.
This movie was total batshit. I was as happy as can be when it started. About ten minutes in (probably not even that long), I was pissed. I decided to live. I wasn't going to let my last experience with Batman be this turd of a movie. It somehow got good reviews but Two-Face/Joker and Riddler/Joker just......anyway, fuck this movie. There was no way things could get any worse......right?
