Well, I am a Christian - but when I say "Christian" I don't mean one of the Nicenes of the 4th century, or a Protestant of the 16th century. I mean a follower of "the way" written about by the earliest Christian texts, many of which were rediscovered in full form in Nag Hamedi Egypt when a child was throwing rocks into a cave, and broke a jar holding texts. These texts were hidden away during the times of burning - when many of the earlier Christian texts were being burned.... Often by other Christians (there was much dissent in the first few centuries).
The God revealed by Jesus was above the God of the Jews. Also a very different sort of being - an origin existed, and then different generations of emanations were born; these emanations were generally in pairs, and these pairs could birth new generations. Sophia (or Wisdom) was part of the latest generation at the dawn of time , and Sophia had a mind. Sophia became curious about the origin of "existence" (God).
In Sophia's journey, she traveled into the darkness, and found nothing. Lost, she tried to emanate on her own without a mate. She gave birth to a being which lacked the perfection of God. This was the being which some people have called Yahovah. Yahovah gave rise to the physical universe (the Big Bang Theory also has a point of origin for the physical universe). Each person has a soul which is a bit of the holy Essenes of Sophia, and it seeks to reunite with God; Sophia (Wisdom) was lost among the biological confines of physical life - although the word of God (named Logos and Jesus in the bible, depending on which Gospel you read, he is called Logos/Word in the Gospel of John) was sent so that souls could return to the totality of God (the Pleroma). So those who follow "the way" (Christianity) would be able to re-unite with God/Pleroma.
4th century Nicene Christianity is simplified and cuts out many of the books originally in the library. Nicenes believe in three emanations of Gods, although these three (father, son, and holy spirit) may have well arisen as a result of Romanization (since Roman households often picked 3 Gods, and the Capitoline Triad was three Gods) - Holy Spirit is Sophia (divine wisdom, the soul), the Father is the Pleroma, and the son is Logos/Jesus. Protestant Christianity is a form descended from Nicene Christianity, their canon/library is the same.
If you are looking for a judgmental God, then there is Satan who judges and condemns humanity, and Yahovah his master... Or perhaps better known in early Christian texts as Lucipher, which is Latin for Light Bringer, associated with the morning star by the Romans, and also the devil by Christians. This is not the God of Jesus, but rather a God Jesus revolted against.
Read your bibles (that is some of the text), and read the apocrypha and books of the Nag Hamedi Library and get a wider understanding and different texts and gospels of Jesus aside from the 4 different gospel accounts. Also, you'll find that this early brand of Christianity is fairly in line with Philo of Alexandria's writings, and Philo was a Jewish leader who lived between 30 BC and 45 AD, pre-existing Christianity, but contemporary to Jesus (he writes not about Jesus, but does mention the Logos as the son of innumerable emanations of God who has influence on the physical world, while God does not). In a way, Philo could be considered a proto-Christian.
Anyway, my God is the God that created the Universe; and the aspect I worship is love. I also feel that things such as science are ways of understanding the universe, and when we are advanced enough, the scientific method can help us better understand God. Via the Cosmological argument, we can conclude the universe had a creator; the premise of the Cosmological Argument was proven in the modern era with the Big Bang Theory - which scientifically states "The Universe began to exist", a premise of the Cosmological argument for the existence of God. So any Christian who condemns science for any reason, in my opinion, is following a doctrine that actually is counter to what Christianity wants us to do; this goes for all religions too - science should be embraced.
I describe myself as a little dose of toxic masculinity.
