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@OP:
You forgot the option "Ballmer stuffed the Xmas turkey with cocaine and had visions of Hello Kitty having sex with the Smurfs and strange mystic numbers"



Stwike him, Centuwion. Stwike him vewy wuffly! (Pontius Pilate, "Life of Brian")
A fart without stink is like a sky without stars.
TGS, Third Grade Shooter: brand new genre invented by Kevin Butler exclusively for Natal WiiToo Kinect. PEW! PEW-PEW-PEW!