CEO of Nintendo, with my first major actions as follows:
1) Stop wasting the company's time and money on a "hardcore" market that will never return to it anyway.
2) Offer official company apologies to the family of Gunpei Yokoi.
3) Place Gunpei Yokoi memorial plaques prominently featuring the phrase "LATERAL THINKING WITH WITHERED TECHNOLOGY" in every office.
4) Tie game licensure to innovation: use a system's full capabilities or go elsewhere. This will also go for in-house development.
5) Acquire Square-Enix. See Step 3, above.
6) Acquire Team Ninja. See Step 3, above.
7) Revive the Wii-era advertising concerning healthy gaming, but intensify the rhetoric, particularly as concerns "geeks and otaku."
8) Beat Miyamoto, Aonuma, Sakamoto, and Iwata (who will be kept on staff as a development supervisor) upside the head with very soft pillows until they return to their senses.
Complexity is not depth. Machismo is not maturity. Obsession is not dedication. Tedium is not challenge. Support gaming: support the Wii.
Be the ultimate ninja! Play Billy Vs. SNAKEMAN today! Poisson Village welcomes new players.
There is much to hate about modern gaming. That is why I support the Wii.
