I actually find dating without considering the other side at least somewhat of a prospective soulmate one of the most ridiculous things now that we are past the arranged marriages stage. One gets sick of it before the other, clinginess on the one side, irritation on the other, I've tried each side exactly once and then didn't want any more of it.
Of course there are the couples where both sides are perfectly fine with casual, plenty-of-personal-space dating, so if you think you're the kind of person then by all means looks for someone of the same mind, this works for what it is. If you're not though, from personal experience, it's sooner or later a lousy arrangement.
So, I'm a fan of the "right person" thing, and as far as those relationships go, yeah you're missing out. But no, 21 is not really late at all.
