highwaystar101 on 30 August 2010
Take out a phone contract that allows three way calls. Whenever you phone someone it automatically calls your girlfriend too, so she can listen in. Then make sure you make a load of long boring phone calls to women all the time, so she has to listen in on for the whole boring conversation just in case you start flirting (Don't, otherwise it wont work).
"Hey Jane, do you think the coffee machine is giving enough milk out? Better get an engineer on it, do you know who has the engineers number?..."
"Hey Sarah, did you catch that documentary on ornithology? Those crows that were able to use twigs as tools is the best thing I've ever seen. I often marvel at their ability to..."
That's what I would do anyway.
