Whenever I hear people talk about JRPGs, they usually refer to the more popular games (such as Final Fantasy, Dragon Quest, Tales, etc.), which tend to have similar attributes (such as being in the high-fantasy genre), but not all JRPGs are like that.
I think Yakuza 3 is a perfect example of a JRPG that takes a more realistic approach. Before someone says that Yakuza 3 isn't an RPG, you earn experience and gain levels, level your abilities, collect items, customize/upgrade your weapons and equipment, explore, complete quests, make dialogue decisions, gain trust from other characters, and so on, so it's very much an action RPG. In many ways, Yakuza 3 felt more like an RPG than FF XIII, at least in my opinion.
In Yakuza 3, the main character isn't some young, effeminate-looking male, but instead, a former yakuza in his forties. Instead of magic or high-tech equipment, you merely have some good old ass-kicking with fists and normal objects, such as bats, knives, and other real-world items.
Valkyria Chronicles is another example of a game that takes a little more realistic approach. It's a turn-based game, but aside from the game's more epic battles, it's mostly combat based on firearms.
Hell, even Demon's Souls, a more fantastical game genre-wise, has combat that is more realistic than many other RPGs.
Anyway, the point is that many people restrict their categorization of JRPGs to only the most popular franchises, but either aren't aware of, or simple ignore, the other types of Japanese-developed RPGs. At the end of the day, these debates are flawed because too many people try to narrowly categorize each genre, when there is a lot more diversity found in each type of genre.
