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Pyro as Bill said:
Fail thread.

OP has completely ignored Luigiboys.

 

 Luigiboys are creepy sons of bitches who pirate their Mario-games. Nintendo tried to capture that audience with Luigi's Mansion, but because the Lunchbox was too kiddy they were too embarassed to buy it.

They also have world domination ambitions.

That's why they created the Weegee-virus.