I'm gay and this is what I have to say (BIG wall of text)

[Grey Acumen]

I don't believe homosexuality is natural or right, but that doesn't mean I feel the need to persecute you for it. I'm comfortably straight, so I don't need to lash out in "fear of teh gays" but neither am I going to hide my views in shame. I tend to boil things down to the simplest ways of looking at it; if everyone in the world was homosexual, the species wouldn't continue, if everyone in the world was straight, the species would continue, therefor homosexuality is not natural.

I also noticed that you pointed out that you were molested, which does seem to come up a lot in the histories of those who do have homosexual tendencies. I'm not trying to tell you to be straight, but I really don't think you should put quite so much stock in a lot of these psychological studies. The way a lot of them are worded, you'll end up believing that all teh choices we make are predetermined purely by our DNA and what happens to us, and there is nothing we can do to change our fate, etc. Yes, there are likely connections to development and the like, but that doesn't override your own ability to choose, you may be at a severe disadvantage, you may not even be totally successful or happy with your choice at first, but you still can choose.

As far as what you said about a straight guy trying to think of sleeping with another guy, and not being able to. I know I could theoretically think of doing it, but I've never met a guy that I felt I would be able to form the type of relationship in which I would be willing to have sex with him. That becomes a moot point, since I've found my fiance, who I do have that type of relationship with, but I find that much of the sexual enjoyment comes from how completely I trust her and how completely she trusts me. This makes me wonder if many of the people who are homosexual simply gave up too soon on searching for a partner of the opposite sex, or didn't give an honest chance to a partner they did find.

As far as the issue of religion. There's always the option of abstinence. Most religions that I know of place more focus on the homosexual activity than with just simply being homosexual. Love the sinner, hate the sin, etc. Otherwise, even if they are going to take issue with it, they can't really submit any positive proof of homosexuality unless you actually have sex with another guy. (NOTE: None of this assumed middle east, etc. Obviously it's more dangerous there)

You also pointed out that one of your friends, which might be attributed to his voice? Meh, that's just falling into stereotypes.

As for the 10 years older thing. That I've got a few issues with. I look back on my high school years occasionally and think, "damn, I had some seriously awesome fun", but I also didn't know what the fuck I was doing when it comes to relationships or myself as an individual. I ended up tying myself into a relationship I never was serious about, and trying to sever things so that I could move on with my life was probably the hardest thing I've ever done.

Couple pieces of advice for any relationship you're in, whether with a guy or a girl:

Do you respect him? Does he respect you? What do you do for fun together? How much of this is not tied to sex? Do you discuss sex seriously together, such as interests and concerns? How much do you know about each other, in terms of family, history, likes, dislikes, etc? Have you ever argued together? 8 months might be early for arguments to crop up, but they are seriously important aspects to a relationship. the important issue is insuring that the goal of the argument is not just simply to "win" but to work towards finding a solution to whatever it is you are arguing over. Arguments are merely an intense form of communication, which are beneficial to a relationship, but when you are only trying to "win" it just becomes a fight.

 

hope that helps.