He says that because you may end up breaking your Switch, it's a great game but can take the piss at times.

Lots of ports to buy this year. Tropical Freeze, DragonQuest Builders 2, Ys VIII, Bayonetta 2, Dark Souls. 

Yeah that Direct was weak. Nothing but small potatoes. For last year's first Switch Direct they announced games going all the way into the second half of 2017 like Mario Odyssey, and Xenoblade 2. Either Nintendo wasn't planning on any big announcements or Nintendo is in for a bad year. And Nintendo can't handle a bad year. It'll kill momentum for the Switch and then that's the end of their company. 

They got me at new Mario Tennis.

Kirby looks like a mastahpiece as I expect from the IP, so nothing new there.

Now I have to beat Dark Souls (dammit Leadified).

May get Ys, liked I & II.

That orchestral DKC intro theme for the Rabbids DLC was godlike Kirkhope.

And Hyrule Warriors is just there to make Fire Emblem look like shit in terms of how to treat your fanbase.

There still Fire Emblem, Yoshi, Octopath, Metroid, Pokemon, Bayonetta, Wolfenstein, Pikmin 4, Retro's new game and probably a bunch of other games too, all in development. At least a few of these will release this year.

D*mnit! Another Hyrule Warriors port. I'll have to but that just to keep my Zelda collection complete (or at least not anymore incomplete).

I've been looking forward to this.

Wonder if they will have another direct soon since this was called a mini.

Fire Emblem and Octopath are the only things confirmed for this year though. If Nintendo is going to keep people interested in their console they need at least 5-6 new games with critical acclaim every year. Last year we got Zelda, Mario, Splatoon, Rabbids, and Xenoblade. There needs to always be something new and good on the horizon to keep social media talking about the Switch. The ports are great 3rd party support and exactly what Nintendo needs as the icing on their 1st party cake. Just don't forget the cake. 

Of the games you mentioned only 3 of them were confirmed at the start of last year the rest were confirmed later on in the year around E3.

But with your response it seems you didn't get the joke.