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Forums - General Discussion - The Depression thread

menx64 on 02 April 2012
Metallicube said:
menx64 said:
maverick40 said:
HesAPooka said:
menx64 said:

For some reason it seems like I am not able to find a girl to hang out or a anything anymore... Until I was 22 it was always very easy for me to get alone with girls, but now it seems for some reason I am kind of invisible or something. Almost four years of drought now, and not a single cloud on the sky yet...
Most of my friends are either married or too busy working that it feels like I have no old friends anymore, I am not thinking about getting married soon (no girl hence the problem) or getting another job (too lazy) and I dont feel like going out with 18-20 years old fellows nor 35+ fellows either... No friends to go out and no luck with girls... /emo


how old are you now?

Wow that is sad. You need to get some confidence man. It seems that alot of people/nerds on this site have low confidence in themselves and can't get women. Before you can be happy with someone else you need to look in the mirror and ne happy with yourself. 

  I know it is a matter of confidence. Somehow I lost confidence after I got rejected by the most amazing woman I have ever met. After that I felt very bad and I promised to stay away from any woman (Pathetic I know). It didnt take long before I tried again but I got rejected again, so I thought obviously I was doing something wrong. I dont have any real female friends (I know some women from work and stuff, but nothing close to a real friend) so I had no real clue on what  was I doing wrong to begin with. So after a few more tries (some were somehow successful some others though...) I realized it had to be me and so my confidence fell down big time. Little by little I feel like I am losing some social skills, for some reason I cannt even keep eye contact with anybody anymore, I feel nervous to talk to people (even when I talk to a bank teller or at the register)... I have a relatively nice job and my economic situation is fine so I guess I am doing some things right but socializing is becoming a major problem for me. 

 

@hesapooka: 26.

I feel ya, I have some major confidence issues as well, but for a different reason. I'm pretty sure I have social anxiety, at least in a mild form. It is basically that nervous feeling in your gut before giving a speech for class - except you feel that in a lot more social situations. Sometimes even just hanging out with friends. so gaining confidence is an uphill battle with that sort of state of mind. I try to be confident but there's always this paranoia in the back of my mind terrified of doing/saying something stupid. I struggle with the eye contact thing too, even with my family and close friends.

And obviously chicks generally aren't too into the whole nervous/shy thing. I do have a couple of girls I occasionally hang out with and consider friends, but the idea of a relationship is about as foreign and intimidating to me as skydiving or climbing Everest.

I'm sure rejection is tough to deal with, though I give you props for at least having the courage to ask in the first place. Some people struggle even with that. If you already have courage, I think confidence should naturally follow. I know it's easy for me to sit here and say, but try not to get too down on one rejection,  and realize that it is a very common thing. I'd say if anything, use the rejection as a growing experience, and the fuel to motivate yourself to persevere. As they say, what doesn't kill you makes you stronger!


 thx for reading my boring post and the advice. Sure, even though I feel somewhat nervous everytime I have to talk to girls, I just do it (I do not have any luck though) but heck I am still alive so someday I will get it done.

 Actually I met a new girl yesterday, fine body, nice face, very talkative and it seemed very interested in talking to me so I did as much as I could to hide all the nervousness and anxiety I was feeling, I dunno if I did a good job but who knows I am just to keep trying.



Menx64

3DS code: 1289-8222-7215

NNid: Menx064

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menx64 on 02 April 2012
HesAPooka said:
menx64 said:
maverick40 said:
HesAPooka said:
menx64 said:

For some reason it seems like I am not able to find a girl to hang out or a anything anymore... Until I was 22 it was always very easy for me to get alone with girls, but now it seems for some reason I am kind of invisible or something. Almost four years of drought now, and not a single cloud on the sky yet...
Most of my friends are either married or too busy working that it feels like I have no old friends anymore, I am not thinking about getting married soon (no girl hence the problem) or getting another job (too lazy) and I dont feel like going out with 18-20 years old fellows nor 35+ fellows either... No friends to go out and no luck with girls... /emo


how old are you now?

Wow that is sad. You need to get some confidence man. It seems that alot of people/nerds on this site have low confidence in themselves and can't get women. Before you can be happy with someone else you need to look in the mirror and ne happy with yourself. 

  I know it is a matter of confidence. Somehow I lost confidence after I got rejected by the most amazing woman I have ever met. After that I felt very bad and I promised to stay away from any woman (Pathetic I know). It didnt take long before I tried again but I got rejected again, so I thought obviously I was doing something wrong. I dont have any real female friends (I know some women from work and stuff, but nothing close to a real friend) so I had no real clue on what  was I doing wrong to begin with. So after a few more tries (some were somehow successful some others though...) I realized it had to be me and so my confidence fell down big time. Little by little I feel like I am losing some social skills, for some reason I cannt even keep eye contact with anybody anymore, I feel nervous to talk to people (even when I talk to a bank teller or at the register)... I have a relatively nice job and my economic situation is fine so I guess I am doing some things right but socializing is becoming a major problem for me. 

 

@hesapooka: 26.


If you ever need any girl advice or want to talk about your situation send me a message or something. I'd be more than happy to talk to just talk to you about it or give you tips or advice you want. 


 Thx. And sure, I'll take your word on that so pls bear with me if I just drop with any questions or whatnot... ;9



Menx64

3DS code: 1289-8222-7215

NNid: Menx064

richardhutnik on 06 April 2012

I got 99 problems... I think on any of them, I will get depressed, so key is to not think on things, just be and do.



menx64 on 09 April 2012
SmokedHostage said:
Contemplating my own suicide.

Coming to terms with my pan-sexuality.

Thinking about whether or not the western world or world in general will be around in the next ten years.

Chronic headaches are getting worse and more recently my ability to concentrate and read are deteriorating.

Worrying whether or not I have a brain tumor, extensive brain damage or have had a stroke in my sleep.

My general motivation to live disappearing.

Long term loneliness taking its toll.

 For some reason ever since I was in highschool that idea crossed my mind a million times, I even thought about how to make a "good" goodbye letter for my family. I had a very difficult childhood so I guess that was just the result of all the things I went thru. At some point I was so obsessed with that idea, that I spent a good amount of hours looking for info online, watching testimonials, documentaries, programs pretty much anything related with it. I have to say that I never really attempted to commit suicide though, it was always present in my mind but nothing else. Several years ago (8 or 7 I dunno) me and my brother found my dad just before he was going to hang himself, it was a very very scary situation, he reacted inmediately after he saw my brother and denied everything afterwards, but we are pretty sure of what we saw. My mom still doesnt know about it, we never really talked about it. I know my dad is better now, he divorced my mom and now has a new family, which is great btw, and somehow I dont really think about suicide as I used to. The feeling is somehow still present sometimes, but I try to keep living and doing things I like (which is anoter topic btw, I guess I am really fucked up ;9).  



Menx64

3DS code: 1289-8222-7215

NNid: Menx064

Joel12345 on 09 April 2012
highwaystar101 said:

I become depressed quite easily and it causes me to lose motivation and confidence (although I try hard not to show it, but some people still see through it).

Luckily my girlfriend is a doctor and going into psychiatry. She's very good at putting things into perspective and saying the right thing. I try not to take advantage of her in this way though.

My problem is that good things don't affect my mood for very long, but bad things affect my mood for days/weeks/months. Bad memory retention is what makes me sad. The thing is, the worst things in my life are so small they would barely register on most people's 'emotional radars', I'm just good at blowing them out of proportion and dwelling on them.

I used to be just like that,I would get sad over some things that didn't matter and they would really bother me.

But then I started working out,joined the schools wrestling teams,track team too.I hardly had any friends last year but this year I make new friends everyweek.Also if going to the gym and you feel shy,don't worry in about a week you won't care and you'll probably make new friends before you know it.Also if you are a little weak at first don't worry you'll get there.Everybody in my family notices how I lost weight,idk how old you are but you are still young man.



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silicon on 09 April 2012

I used to be depressed all the time. Even in elementary school I was often overcome with depression. It wasn't until University where I discovered mindfulness. It's the process of becoming self-aware and thinking about thinking.

One of the most significant changes was reflecting on which values I hold and live my life. It is not simply listing values and choosing some, but understanding yourself and recognizing the aspects of your life that are enjoyable.

Ever since then every day has been the happiest day of my life.



AFFLICTION on 09 April 2012

I find a lot of myself in all you.

My heart goes out to you all.



menx64 on 11 April 2012
spurgeonryan said:
AFFLICTION said:
I find a lot of myself in all you.

My heart goes out to you all.


Thank you for the kind gesture!

 

I was ran over today, and did not sue. That was my chance!


I hope you are ok my friend. Why not? You will need all the money you can get for therapy after playing all those N64 games, at least finger/wrist therapy ;) 



Menx64

3DS code: 1289-8222-7215

NNid: Menx064

AFFLICTION on 11 April 2012
spurgeonryan said:
AFFLICTION said:
I find a lot of myself in all you.

My heart goes out to you all.


Thank you for the kind gesture!

 

I was ran over today, and did not sue. That was my chance!


Yea I heard about that, weird stuff. But I'm glad you came out of it unscathed



AFFLICTION on 11 April 2012
menx64 said:
spurgeonryan said:
AFFLICTION said:
I find a lot of myself in all you.

My heart goes out to you all.


Thank you for the kind gesture!

 

I was ran over today, and did not sue. That was my chance!


I hope you are ok my friend. Why not? You will need all the money you can get for therapy after playing all those N64 games, at least finger/wrist therapy ;) 

Here's the thread detailing poor spurge's run in with the driver from hell!

http://gamrconnect.vgchartz.com/thread.php?id=142157&page=1