And I just found out that my wife is a long lost sister....now what???

Your grandfather/nephew will be pleased by this news.

You should take out a large insurance policy on her life (~$1,000,000) and then push her in front of a train. Bingo! Now your problem is gone and you're a millionaire.

Wish I'd thought of that.......

So when you masturbate.. you're having sex with your cousin?

yup!, And when I have sex with my wife, I am having sex with my cousin, and my long lost sister. 

not only that, also when you're doing it with your wife, she is having sex with your cousin, her brother, and her cousin???

Edit, oh, you beat me to it, nvm.

This has gone too far, and it ends here. No more "OMG my cousin!" threads, please.