Yes, come my brothers! Arise, my sisters! I offer you the opportunity to cleanse yourself of the doubt that clouds your mind; that sinks your judgement and sales predictions to the murky depths of obscurity. I give you this opportunity to rise up and say as one "Wow, there's something to this peripheral!" I offer you the chance to forgive the god that is Motion Control technology!
It pains me to see my young disciples in such denial of success. Did you not learn the first time! Oh yes, I know it was a tough time for ye, back in 2006. I know that merely bringing up the year gives you pain and twinges of regret. I know that your "The Wii is Wiitarded" and "Another fail for Nintendo" threads still haunt your dreams and fuel your nightmares. But like the milky relief that is Tums, I have a solution! Read! Study! Have an open mind.
Imagine a Dance Dance Revolution without a dance pad! Yes, it would actually be a revolution!
Imagine an exercise game where you can actually use real weights and equipment instead of plastic knock offs! Imagine Microsoft marketing the hell out of this to the Asian culture and even our fatty American ways!
Imagine a shooting game.. where you shoot things! With your hand!
I know it's hard to fathom not using gimmicky items to control your avatar's. I know its tough to understand the concept of "It knows when I smile. It knows when I sleep.... help me" in a single box that resides on your television set is hard to understand. I get it.
But do not smite down what you do not understand! Beauty killed the beast!
Already Japanese developers have embraced the technology, and are probably planning a Pokemon game where you actually stuff your cat into a ball and throw it at the television!
Already they are making a metal gear solid game where you can actually hide in a cardboard box!
In the next Street Fighter Game, you can play as Chuck Norris if you know how to perform a roundhouse kick!
In the next Persona game being ported to the 360, you can actually summon your Persona if you shoot yours... okay that one was cancelled.
The point is, brothers, sisters, have faith in the technology! Know that NATAL will be a wild success, not only because of what it does, but of what it will be advertised as being able to do! Bill Gates and Miley Cyrus will release a number one track that hypnotizes you if you resist the call of your controller-less god! And it will rhyme endlessly! (With DJ BillMcgates spewing the line "Take a ride on my Natal, and i'll simulate her Naval, oooooh yeah)
(In other words, it would be a really, really bad idea to bash and predict bad sales of the product, when you and I both know that regardless of performance, it's going to sell millions of units. Or did you not live in 2006 when the consumer ate up the Wii motes? Microsoft only needs to find the right games, and advertise to the right demographic)
I leave you to confess yourself to Father Dorbin. And your sins will be cleansed!
