oh man, f me dude, How many times can I get it wrong. OK twesterm. There we go. Sorry again. So..... any new recipies?

 He cleaarly isn't talking to you Twesterm as he was asking for Twestern. No one wants cooking advice from a guy with no pants.

who's tweetstern?

tweetstern!?! I knoe I didn't say that! LOL

 If you think about it.. it has sense..

OK, My recipe is for the "cronary sandwich" a dish I created myself.

Ok, first fry three slices of bread. Next fry and agg and place ot between two of the slices of bread, next fry up some bacon, put it on top of the egg and make into a triple decker sandwich.

Don't eat many of these because YOU WILL DIE!

Is that supposed to be coronary, highwaystar101? Why not batter and fry the bread?
Also, check this out: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Deep-fried_pizza

Commando, here's a récipé suggestion. I hope this helps.

• Quesadillas! They're fried, fattening and taste good. Quesadilla is sort of an umbrella term for fried tortillas.  If you look up récipés for them on the Internet, you'll see that every chef out there has their own take on them. Look them up on Wikipedia and you'll see that Wikipedia isn't even sure what's in them. I had a friend living on res. at uni. who used to make them. The récipé he used meant they were essentially slack, fried nacho tortillas. They were slack because, well, for real quesadillas, you're supposed to use a couple of tortillas and ... some other ingredients.  This récipé is cheap and beats nachos! Here it is:
  
  • Heat up some oil or butter in a frying pan
  • Place a tortilla on the pan
  • Quickly put a spoonful or two of salsa in a blob on one half of the tortilla and cover that whole half in grated cheese
    Have you made a fried or pressed cheese sandwich before? It's a bit like that. You want enough cheese to stick the two halves together, but in this case, it's two halves of the one tortilla.
  • Using an egg turner, fold the tortilla (in half) over on itself. It should look a bit like a pastie or omelette
    
  • After a minute or two, flip it over
  • With a little luck, the cheese will have sealed the tortilla into a parcel, and it'll be nice and brown on top. Cook for another minute at most and then pop it on a plate. Repeat the whole process as many times as necessary

And while we're on the subject of cooking in general, here are a few miscellaneous cooking secrets I've discovered:

• A quiche is an omelette with cream in puff pastry! That's all it is. Housewives, chefs and the elite just call it a quiche to confuse you. You can buy puff pastry frozen (as I recently found out). So, if you can make an omelette:
  • Turn on an oven and grease a ceramic dish
  • Put puff pastry over the dish and cut slits in it and do pastry origami of sorts, ensuring that the base is covered
    
  • Mix up an omelette mix with cream, and throw in some veggies and/or meat
  • Pour in the mix
  • Cover it with grated cheese
  • Put it in the oven and leave it there until it's golden brown (about half an hour on half-way on my oven)
• Any pasta sauce can be a pasta bake sauce! The special sauces you can buy let you put the pasta in raw. The end product, a pasta bake is essentially stirred up pasta and sauce ... baked. I buy (cheap!) Napolitana sauces and use those. So if you can stir pasta up on a plate, here we go:
  
  • Turn on an oven
  • Cook a handful or two (use your own judgement) of pasta in a big pot of boiling water
  • Drain the pasta, open a jar of your favourite el cheapo sauce and have lots of grated cheese handy
  • Pour a layer of pasta in a ceramic dish, then a layer of sauce, then a layer of cheese
  • Repeat this until the dish is full, finishing with a thick layer of cheese
  • Put it in the oven and leave it there until it's golden brown (about half an hour on half-way on my oven)
• Junk food is really easy to make. Burgers and pizza are particularly easy to make. For pizzas, you can buy frozen pizza bases or use pita bread if you're really cheap. Then, it's just a matter of applying tomato paste and grated cheese liberally with additional toppings of your choice. For burgers, the general formula is: Burger rolls + lettuce + tomato + onion + cheese + patty + mustard + mayonnaise + tomato sauce = burger. Don't pay $5 for take-away burgers! Any take-away burger is a variation on that formula. Best of all, if you make burgers, housemates and family will count that as cooking.

Right on! gurok. I'll have to try the pastry. I love quesadillas though.

One of these days I'll post on here how I like to make my patented (not really patented) Omlettillas! So goood!

well actually, theres no recipe to it, Its just an omelette in two torilla shells.

The thing is though that you have to wait for the egg to settle before adding the chese. and the secret ingredient is just a pinch brown sugar(mix it in the milk), serve with salsa and it is great!

 what about Rachel Ray with no pants?