Strange question? Yes I know, but I am drinking and I just got to wondering.

Other than the occasional lifting and enjoyment of tapping my fingers on my work desk I don't know what I do with them.

When I type I never use my pinkies and it gets annoying holding them up, it gets tiring.

If I ever had to lose a finger it would be my first choice.

So, what use is your pinkies?

I feel madness in the air.

First of all, I had to google pinkies.

And second, it's the ones you use when your ears itch.

If my ear itches I take care of that sucka with any finger available.

By the way, I have toe thumbs too. 

Should I make a thread about them?

Pinky promises.

That's right!

Haven't pinky swore since I was ~10 though.

Do you mean that you use your toe thumb when your ears itch? Then yes, make a thread. With pictures.

Toe Thumb is too ridiculously fat to try and scratch the inside of my ear.

sucking

He provides me endless hours of comedic gold along with Bra-

Oh, you mean those stupid fingers? I chopped mine off. They make trying to put your fingers through the handle of a cup a chore.

Pretending to be a evil mastermind every time I go to a restuarant and hold a glass.