BasilZero said:
Oh no , I didnt mean it like you were qualified or not - just I never really paid attention to the tag and dont remember seeing an announcement (probably happened while I was away from this site). |
I know it's not what you meant but it's a fair comment, I've barely moderated for about a year now for various reasons, I wouldn't be surprised if a lot of people don't realise that I'm a Mod. I only keep this role because I tell myself that I need it for this thread and another. This thread has had issues in the past between it and previous Mod teams so I imagine there's some caution about that. But I barely moderate lately, I only applied to give Xbox fans a voice on the Mod team and I did that at the start but have failed to do so lately.
My downward spiral of not giving a shit began a couple years ago, when I was mentioned in some group PM chain and accused of banning a bunch of Sony users that I never did, Lol. No apology or anything for the false accusation, I just thought to myself, I'm going to be labelled as the "enemy" regardless to some users. From there it has been one thing after another. Another reason I would mention is that my favourite aspect of being a Mod genuinely became helping the site out, the community, spending hours a day with TalonMan coming up with bug fixes, new features, etc. Genuinely trying to improve the website for everyone but since he left that aspect is now gone, I think I spent so long invested in that stuff which was actually "fun" that when I came back to having to do only the typical Mod stuff again, it became a bit of a downer.
The hacker targeting me as a Mod pissed me off too, Lol. I did help issue bans to quite a lot of trouble makers near the start, users who have been demanded by other users to be banned for years, we as a team cleared quite a lot of those up, but as we lose more users but gain so few, it makes moderating an even more difficult and complicated task. Even though I've massively cut back on moderating lately, I still get moaned at almost every time that I use my powers, even for the most minor of moderations such as a warning or a thread ban (seriously...?) people lose their shit.
It's a thankless job which only receives constant moaning from users, for a site barely standing because the owner doesn't give a shit, but people like Trunks who genuinely care about the website work their asses off for shitty pay and he also gets bitched about by some users which I see and it frustrates me even further. I question a lot why I'm even doing it lately and if I'm doing a good enough job. I stepped down from Head Mod because I was going through a stressful period in my life and knew I wouldn't be active enough to justify keeping the position, that was my own personal ethical decision, I didn't think a Head Mod should remain Head Mod if they weren't going to be active, now I question if I'm active enough to even keep the normal Mod position.
And then various other things have happened lately in my life and around us in the world which have cut my patience so short for some users bullshit that I'm often a bit too blunt for a Moderator, I can accept that criticism, I sometimes don't hold back in my wording, I can come across as a bit insulting towards users who are being obvious assholes or troublemakers, I'm losing my patience and not acting like a professionally spoken Moderator but I really can't be arsed with that stuff lately, Lol. Idk. I think I need that feeling back for why I became a Mod in the first place. And hey, I know I can be an ass in my wording, which is why I rarely ever moderate someone if they're a bit of an ass back to me during a debate, Lmao.
Feels good to vent though because I've been bottling this stuff up for a couple years now and I do feel better already 
