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PSintend0 on 17 March 2018
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PSintend0 said:
StarOcean said:
Tell her.

Cheating at all is the worst breach of trust in a relationship. If she’s as conservative as you say, she’ll probably get mad and hopefully leave you. I have absolutely no sympathy for cheaters -with the exclusion of very extreme circumstances, of which you are not apart of. You were being stupid, shouldn’t have been drinking or doing whatever it was you were -neither are real excuses.

I’ve been cheated on enough in the past to think if it happens once, it’ll never happen again. It’s a naive thought -one perhaps your girlfriend will have. Nowadays if someone cheats, I leave immediately -no questions asked. Unless you were in an open relationship or whatever, it’s not okay -and from how you’re acting, there’s a 100% it isn’t open. Be a man and face the consequences of making bad decisions.

People are not perfect and a girl kissed him while he was very drunk etc. so its not that black and white, however telling is probable better than feeling guilty and wondering when she is going to find out. And if they haven´t even talked on what is accepted and what is off limits then its even more on the grey area. For many just a quick kiss isn´t that big of a deal, but everyone is different. I woulnd´t be mad about that.

StarOcean as you can see my post wasn´t meant to oppose your post or underrate it. I agreed with some parts of your post, but in my opinion some parts of your post and some of your your views were quite extreme. I still respect your opinion and realize that people are different.

My main point being that world and things are not black and white. The OP has not said how long has he been with his girlfriend and if they have discussed rules and boundaries of the relationship. He didn´t know if that kiss counted as cheating and from that I assumed it might be that they haven´t even discussed on what is fine and what is not. Also being drunk etc. is not an excuse, but it is a thing that influensed the way things went. Its one of the reasons it happened. As is the fact that he was kissed and not the other way around.

I could have quoted other posts that were similar to yours, but your post seemed most extreme and for that reason I quoted it.

My train of thought: He was drunk etc. and made a mistake. He is not sure if it counts as cheating-> Maybe he is young and they haven´t been together that long. Have they even discussed what are the rules of their relationship? Maybe not...-> This all is not that black and white. The situation is more on the grey area, but still he should tell his girlfriend and possible talk about if its okay or not, if it counts as cheating or not.