| Rab said: Well they WILL find out if you tell them and hurt them in the process, and if they do anyway which is far from guaranteed, suck it up, take it and move on, your mistake, your responsibility |
Telling her doesn´t take away what happened. It might not relieve him from feeling guilty, but it will reduce the fear of getting caught and its fair to the other person to know who you really are. And if she finds out later on then she is going to be more hurt and can question if there are more things that he lied about. She might then feel that she wasted all that time on him for nothing.
Giving her a chance to decide whether to forgive or not is a good thing to do, instead of being selfish and deciding without her opinion.
People don´t need to be honest all the time or tell everything to everyone, but this is about intimate and close realtionship between two people. In that kind of relationships its more important to let be honest, at least about important things and form the close connection which comes through being open and honest with each other.
