It's an interesting story OP because I underwent something a lot like it a couple of years back. I have a girlfriend on anti-depressants and taking the pill... in our case it turned out to be a false alarm of sorts. Nowadays she discovered she has pure red cell aplasia and, well, not recommended to have a child on these circumstances, despite both of us willing for it one day. Maybe when we're like 35 or 40 we'll have the money for a surrogate, but then, we'll probably be a bit tired to run after children at those ages. On the other hand there you are, you two, on the apex of your physical condition, contemplating the life of an unborn child and how it might impact you. So I sort of see younger me on you I guess.
OK, so what you should do? There are many more options rather than keeping the child and seeing it "ruin your life" or an abortion. This is sort of your "fight or flight" instinct kicking in before a seemingly unsurmontable challenge that shuddenly showed up. But fight or flight isn't the only options when you are a human being gifted with such a swirly and juicy prefrontal cortex. Do consider the fact that parents or other relatives might be willing to share half or most part of such a burden while you pursue your academical life. Maybe where you life the infrastructure of child care is actually pretty nice. Maybe your neighbors and friends can help sometimes, or a close couple is willing to adopt the child (we probably would). There is always handing the child to adoption on anonymity, if nothing else seems to work. Life is full of possibilites!
