only777 said:
If you're not sure, I'll try to be clearer. If you kiss someone, then get naked with that person, then take a shower what message does that give out? Unless she was in a mixed gender swimming pool, I can see no reason why you would get totally naked with someone after having just been kissing them unless sex was about to happen. Who in their right mind gets naked and showers with someone, and thinks "Oh I hope they don't think that these actions means I want sex" It's a ridiculous thing to try to defend. This to me stinks of a publicity grab. |
Well here's the rest of the story
For those who wish to BLAME ME or any other survivor out there, I want you to know that you are the very reason that I am so brutally honest. I could have hidden details. I could have kept some info to myself, but NO. You need to know the truth and to see the reality of the situation. No matter what a person does, it is not an invitation for rape. It doesn't matter if I kissed him. It doesn't matter if he was drunk. It doesn't matter if I said yes to a shower. I never said he could get violent with me. I never said he could make me bleed. I never said he could rape me. But still, that's how the scene went down. I don't need to explain myself but if you're wondering WHY I took a shower with him, it was written in the text, I'd been sick with food poisoning for 2 days and needed to sweat it out. My current place of residence has only cold water (third world problems are real!) and it seemed like a miracle to be offered a hot shower. That's not what he was there for though, because as soon as he got a chance, he threw me to the ground and had his way. Dealing with rape is hard enough but the aftermath is often even more traumatic but I did this for you and I did this for me. The US Embassy and the South African police are super supportive and he may be arrested as soon as this week. Thank you for the love. And for the victim blamers, I send love, peace, and enlightenment to you so that you may be a beacon of light for us, too.
And no, having a shower with a friend is not consent to sex. The message is you trust that friend enough, which was a big error on her part.
And it seems she did go to the police.
