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You know what, I'm not letting this one go. It's beyond absurd. The designers could easily "keep" their original vision by adding a difficulty option. How? Just call it something degrading like "ultra pussy mode." That's fine, I would own that since I was never good enough for some games like Ninja Gaiden. I concede to you guys' superior skillz.

There, problem solved. You retain the original intent which is to convey a sense of smugness and contempt for the gaming masses.