The Romantic Advice Thread

[Mr Khan]

NiKKoM said:

Mr Khan said:
Trying to vet local coffee shops, as i'm resolved to ask her "for coffee" (or some equivalent light meal/drink), next Wednesday, but it's a very dense college district, so I worry about overcrowding. Sadly something i can only ask local people about, and it's hard to do so without offing my hand.

Key is that i only have an hour, which is a good thing because it provides a safe, no-pressure exit from the scenario, keeping it light and casual, but then it doesn't do if we have to spend a lot of time searching for a venue.

Seriously.. Relax.. You're putting way too much thought into it.. You're over expecting things right now making it dissappointing whatever happens.. She could say: "maybe another time".. And then we have 20+ replies in a new thread about the meaning of that.. Just try to wing it.. Where ever you ask her, just point to a direction and say "lets go there".. Even a nice walk and talk is at this point a win for you.. your worried about overcrowding? You haven't even asked her for coffee.. xD 

And don't you go thinking about what you are gonna talk about in that hour.. Waste of time, its never ever gonna be how you imagine it.. If trashleg and I would say 5 things to talk about it would be 9 different thing and 1 common and that is your study. An hour could be long or short but you'll only know it then.. So don't put energy into thinking about that (which is easy for me to say cause I'm a easy smooth talker, but seeing you posting here i know you can wing it..)

Step by step.. Relax.. Go play videogames.. You're gonna drive yourself nuts before wednesday..

I had a few thoughts on ice breakers, but i agree that for the most part the conversation has to be organic. (ice breakers just plant the seed and then follow the conversation from there), especially since how the conversation goes is the best indicator of compatability (not necessarily of romantic interest, i get that too. But a good conversation means she could, at least, be a friend).

Egh, i've got a lot to distract me before next Wednesday. New job that has me working a "full" shift on Mondays and Fridays, plus a paper due for the class i have with her that i have to pound out early because of the wedding i mentioned (i'm losing a weekend's worth of homework time).

Although since then i have a better idea of where to try, so long as the weather agrees (forecast says sunny and hot, though that could change), one which could work incidentally, since i think it's in the direction she would walk to catch the bus.

(yes, i know, overthinking. I know that whatever happens, it will be quite different from what I imagine, but I always feel more comfortable with a plan, even when i know things are going to go off-script. What i'm actually doing this semester is quite different from what my plans were four months ago, for instance)