I hear you. And being young does play to my advantage here. And every time I think of things to come and where I am now I do feel a lot better and optimistic, and I know it's better for both of us that way.
But then I get sad and nostalgic anyway, which I would assume is the standard case of "my mind is telling me no, but my body is telling me yes". I don't feel like talking to people irl about it, so I put on a charade when we went for drink yesterday, it's just weird not having the self control to stop feeling so Fucking sorry for it ending. Which is I guess what love is. I do think am a partly sociopath because I do hate talking to people and would much prefer to do my own thing, and when I do have something I don't have love for it or anything, but when it's gone I miss it like fuck.
Disconnect and self destruct, one bullet a time.
