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I've come up with clearly the most logical and obvious solution.
Wii One.

I'll be honest, WiiU is a completely TERRIBLE name. I don't know who loved that enough at Nintendo to slap it on their product. And personally even when I hear Iwata pronouncing it in Directs it's not always that easy to register the U as a distinct part of the name.. Wii 2 or Wii Ultra would have even been far better.