Should probability invalidate responsibility?

[SvennoJ]

DarthVolod said:

SvennoJ said:

 

Now is a good opportunity step up, break the cycle and be a good father for his child.
Sure, sometimes a child can be better off with a surrogate parent but the biological parent is still the better option. It's cruel to put the child through years of self doubt trying to figure out why his father thought he was too much of a burden to care for him.

It happened, it can't be undone, he is resposible, should the child be punished for it?

If the mother doesn't want to be a mother then the father has the option to take custody of the child and get the mother to pay child support. It all takes a lot more time with the current system then the other way around, yet he still has the options. Apart from abortion ofcourse. Equal treatment doesn't work in this case where one party grows a human life inside them.

What about his feelings? It seems that you are suggesting that the only person of concern here is the child. What about the life that he wanted to live? I have encouraged him to find any way he can to escape child support and to escape this transparent attempt to manipulate and control him that this toxic woman is conducting. Why should he sacrifice his life and his happiness just so a woman (who has no respect for him and his feelings as indicated by this event) can raise a child?

Yes, I have the deepest sympathies for the child, and it was not his fault that he was born into this situation, but my friend wanted no part of this. It was the mother, and the mother alone that held all the cards, and she decided to have the child; the father's choice be damned. If anyone is complicit in the suffering of the child it is her, the father's choice was well established from the start.

He is responsible? He did not want the child, but that doesn't matter to anyone apparently. The only person with a choice here is the mother. She has all of the power in this shakedown, and the state is her muscle.

Despite her abhorrent behavior, if she wanted to give up custody I would argue on her behalf that she should not have to pay child support either. Neither sex should be required to subsidize another human life against their will.

Did she sabotage the condom, did she rape him? I assume he was a consenting adult in the act, so he needs to take full responsibilities for the consequences. You can't ask someone to change their moral fiber or biological nature just to suit his feelings.
That's life, you can't always get what you want. Sometimes doors close, sometimes new ones open. Best to make the most of the hand you're dealt. Change is scary yet he might grow to like being a dad.

I've seen what happens to single mothers where the father does everything to dodge child support. It's not pretty and the only ones that benefit are lawyers.

If anyone is complicit in the suffering of the child it is her, the father's choice was well established from the start.
That is the most absurb reverse logic I've heard. Wearing a condom is not a EULA absolving him of any consequences. I assume it wasn't her choice either at the time. And when it comes to abortion, that's not something anyone can decide beforehand. I'm not against abortion, but I certainly won't ask anyone to kill their own child, which is the way a lot of people feel about it.

His only way out is to do a paternity test and hope it's not his.