Should probability invalidate responsibility?

[DarthVolod]

SvennoJ said:

DarthVolod said:

 

I would disagree ... the very presence of a condom would suggest that pregnancy was not the intended goal of the sexual encounter. It would be obvious to anyone that in such a situation the pregnancy was an accident.

An abortion should be conducted at the discretion of the woman. It is her body, and the ultimate decision to abort should be in her hands in the same way that the decision to undergo any medical procedure should be up to the individual (assuming they are competent to make such decisions).

The man, however, should not be legally required to care for the child. He can choose to if he wishes, but no legal obligation should exist. After all, it is the woman's decision to have a child, and it should be the man's decision to either support the child or to not support it.

In matters of custody, it would depend on which parent is assuming the role of the child's guardian. Either they both will, one parent will, or neither parent will support the child.

This seems like the most logical/fair approach to this issue. Both parties would have to consent to raising the child as opposed to the double standard we currently have where women hold all the power. Unfortunately, the current law is heavily slanted in favor of women:

A woman can:

1. Have the child and raise it with the father

2. Have the child and collect child support from the father if he decides not to stay with the mother and child

3. Have the full support of family courts to take full custody of the child and keep him/her from the father at any moment she pleases to (even if the father sticks around)

4. Have an abortion at virtually any moment and end the pregnancy; washing her hands of the whole situation

5. Offer the child for adoption; also washing her hands of the whole thing

 

A man can:

1. Watch helplessly as the mom chooses one of the options listed above.

 

Speaking as a man, I would gladly take the options available to women. Options = power, and a lack of choices = powerlessness.

 

As long as consentual sex was involved both partners are responsible for the outcome, whether pregnancy was intented or not.

I agree that the women should have the final say when abortion comes up. I worded it wrong, I didn't mean the man had the option to force the women to carry the child to labour. But if she chooses not to, the man is still the legal father with full responsibility, unless both parties decide that he gives up custody.

I guess you haven't seen your wife go through a difficult pregnancy and trying to recover from a botched C-section if you say you like the options available to women. It's fine they have all the power when it comes to child birth.

The problem still comes to down to whether or not a person should be forced to incur a financial responsibility for a child. In reality, it will always be the man paying the child support as contrasted to women who are almost never expected to pay even in the rare case that they do not receive custody. It is a double standard, and the best way to eliminate it would be to end child support as a practice. A man or woman has no financial burden to raise a child. Both should be allowed to offer a child for adoption or perform an abortion (in the case of both parents not wanting to raise a child), or to avoid any financial responsibility of raising a child if they do not wish to raise that child. Becoming a parent and being a parent should be a 100% voluntary action ... not something forced upon people by the state.

You are right, I have not seen my wife suffer through a difficult pregnancy, but I have seen my best friend psychologically destroyed by a burden to raise a child that he never wanted. Unfortunately, the law really doesn't care about him, the mother holds all the power to bring the pregnancy to term, end it, or whatever she wants to do basically. All he can do is shut up and take it.

I can't imagine what it would be like to experience a difficult pregnancy, but I also cannot imagine the pain/fear/anger my friend went through as he was stripped of his freedom to choose the course of his life. If given the choice, I can promise you that he would gladly suffer through the physical pain of child birth in order to rid himself of the incredible burden that has been placed on him against his will.