| attaboy said: I don't know why people got the impression that I have unrealistic expectations or that I don't know how to find decent women. I'm awesome! I didn't want her to be a model or anything. That doesn't even turn me on, anyway. I just want average, at least. It's just hard to break up with someone when they really haven't done anything wrong. She wants to meet my family, friends, etc. and I've been putting it off for about a week, now. I think I'm just going to do one of two things: -not talk to her anymore and totally disappear from the earth OR -(thanks, xJBOwnagex) just say I was attracted to you but now, I'm not anymore. And, I think I will do it tomorrow. |
It's sad that people are calling you shallow and blaming you for not being physically attracted to this girl. The fact is humans are hardwired a certain way, evolutionarily speaking, where attraction does matter.
For those judging, Google it or watch The Science of Sex or research it before judging a person for not being into this girl. If anything, the OP was less shallow, because he went with it initially and gave her a shot based on her personality and online chemistry, but unfortunately the lack of sexual and physical attraction was too great to ignore. Not many people even go that far. And why don't people think she is shallow for going for a guy that is athletic or posting misleading pics on her page? Double standards, anyone?
OT, don't lie or scumbag your way out of it. It'll be better for her, not in the immediate sense but overtime, if you're honest. Just be tactful in the way you say what you're going to say, e. g. don't use the word "fat". Say the relationship isn't working out, and if she asks why tell her that even though you like her a lot, you can't force yourself to be attracted to her. It'll hurt her feelings (something lots of people will jump through hoops just to avoid), but it might motivate her to lose weight. Or at the very least, she won't try to entice a guy who's not into bigger girls by posting misleading pics online, because she won't want to go through the embarrassment again. Believe me, honesty, in this case, is best.
