I'll just comment on the PSN and XBL Gold portion. (At this point in time I am not going to argue which is better, except on dl speeds. XBL is hands down much faster. Hopefully that changes in the PS4.)
Though XBL Gold doesn't offer much more than PSN right now, by charging $$ it was always forced to stay relevant and show why you should pay $$ over a free service.
Some cool things that were only available for XBL Gold (Sadly Discontinued)
Netflix party watch (I loved this feature. You could watch Netflix with friends all over the country as if you were in the same room. Perfect for bad movies, or watching classics.)
1 vs. 100 (This was also awesome for having fun with friends in a live environment.)
At this point in time why would anyone pay for XBL if PSN is free? IMHO at this point in time XBL does not offer anything to make it more valuable than PSN. But I continue to pay for XBL because most of my friends only have a 360 (Well more of my friends have a Wii than anything ;))
Here is the true reason I prefer the 360 over the PS3. Games on average go on sale for less on the 360 than the PS3 in the US. This may be because more 360 copies are shipped in the US, but none the less I can often get a third party AAA game for $10 - $15 on the 360 within 12 - 18 months of release. Sometimes sooner.
