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I am not happy about NK having nukes but the reality is that there is something fundamentally wrong when countries with an arsenal of nukes condemn a nation for wanting them.

It is a policed world. Police can have weapons and show them, civilians are not allowed any (as is the case in civilized countries).

To be honest I rather live in the current scenario than one with every mad leader having nukes so I am not too bothered by this.

However one question do need to be asked. And one thing to ponder.

If Japan, Germany or S.Korea built nukes will there be such an outrage?

History has shown that today's friend is tomorrow's enemy. This friendship can be as old as a couple hundred years old but eventually things do and will fall apart, probably most likely with shrinking resources. Leaders are aware of this.
I believe this is why nukes or some super weapon will always be with us.