Dating someone with kids

[GhaudePhaede010]

Max King of the Wild said:

d21lewis said:

GhaudePhaede010 said:

Max King of the Wild said:

GhaudePhaede010 said:

 

 

 

 

I'm gonna have to agree with d21lewis on this one and I guess I have to agree to disagree with you.  Two adults should have developed the skills to deal with losing somebody that comes into their lives.  That's what dating is all about.  You're trying to find that one person that is compatible with you and your life (including children).  Children don't have that.  In my opinion, it is totally unfair to introduce somebody to a child when they aren't ready to accept that responsibility.  The child winds up getting attached and thinking  that this person is going to be a part of their life and then has to shoulder the burden of thinking that they may have been the reason the relationship didn't work out.  You're going to do this to a child every time you meet some hot chick/dude at the grocery store?  Too many people in and out of your kids life.  Not good.

You get to know the person.  You see if they're the kind of person that you want around your kid.  Then, you introduce them when you feel like they're going to be there for the long haul.  You can't just pick up on that when you first meet someone.  It takes about a month for their real personality to come out.  And if I personally just met someone, even if I'm 100% ready to be a father and they instantly start forcing their kid on me before I'm ready to tackle that obstacle, It's going to scare me away.  It's a red light.  It's like meeting somebody, going out on one date, and them saying "I love you".  I'm not afraid of love but going that far, that fast is going to scare the fuck out of me.

Of course you are going to agree with yourself! LOL!

Also, I completely agree with you. Kids are going to be confused if they meet everyone their parent dates especially if they only meet them once because it doesn't work out. The relationship needs to be steady first and foremost.

A relationship is not, "steady" until ALL parties involved feel that way. INCLUDING THE CHILDREN. I almost feel as if you guys have no experience on this topic at all. d21 is obviously trolling a bit and having some fun with me. I like that. Ugh, I wish everyone understood what I am trying to convey. My baby's mother and I have these conversations all the time. To her I, "magically" found a good woman while she struggles. But to me, she advertises herself incorrectly and therefore, meets men like the topic creator. No offense, but she needs to meet men that are ready for that kind of situation. She needs to advertise that as her selling point so people know exactly whaty they are getting into. What happens is, instead of getting random men that cannot handle the situation applying for the relationship, she would get men that are looking for those qualities. It would not be the revolving door you think because the type of men that apply would be DRASTICALLY different than topic creator in mentality about children and her as a woman in the first place.