My poos are way too quick for me to think of anything to do. 90% of the time done pooing before I finish peeing.
But I'll tell a couple of pooing stories.
Once I was really pooing myself, and my friend too, so we went to an empty public toilet together, and there were only two pooing cubicles, so we had a chat while we were pooing and hearing each others splashes. It was weird... I attribute to to experimentation as a teenager.
This other time I was at a party. We were playing a drinking game and everyone kept choosing me and I kept losing. In about 10 minutes I had drunk a whole bottle of vodka myself. I was OK for the next 10 minutes and then all the alcohol went to my mind at once and I passed out.
The rest of the story is from what my friend's told me because I don't remember anything, but looking at proof next day I trust them... So I started puking like crazy while passed out on the floor, and I was all covered in puke. My friends decided to take my clothes off (they were considerate enough to leave my boxers) because they were covered in vomit. Then I told them that I needed to poo badly. So they took me to the toilet all the way upstairs practically dragging me and let me in. Then, while I was pooing, I passed out again and I fell forward, hitting my nose against the radiator. I started nosebleeding a lot. So I was trying to manage the poo, vomit and nosebleed going on all at once (like that South Park ep.), but apparently failed miserable and the house, which I shared with my workmates, was a fucking disaster. Then next morning I had to wake up early to go to work and had to stand the looks full of hate and laughter while I had the biggest hangover of my life.
Fun times!
No troll is too much for me to handle. I rehabilitate trolls, I train people. I am the Troll Whisperer.
