I must be some kind of deranged masochist. I actually downloaded the Kinect labs, and even went so far as to download a couple of the gadgets. I did this for you guys so nobody else would have to feel like gouging their eyes out. Yes the whole experience was underwhelming to put it mildly. Basically all of the gadgets tally up to one thing sticking a picture onto an object. All you get are variations on a theme. Which is supremely disappointing especially since you can't take any of the toys out to play with.
Kintect Me was the first gadget I tried, and this one is a disaster. I am just a couple degrees above alabaster, and I came out looking like I was Hispanic. Obviously this isn't me so I gave it another shot. Now I look like I shoved my nose into a bag of flour. The third go was closer, but still not close enough. Point being Kinect is not going to do you justice unless your in the sunlight. Beyond this glaring technical problem your imagination is stymied. There is something unrewarding about posing in street clothes for a camera. Microsoft has been charging folks for accessories for year now. Why can't we edit those into the shoots. Hell let us use those backgrounds we are charged for. Instead of childish back drops.
Bobble Head was the the second gadget I tried out. This is the damndest thing. This once actually did a better job of catching my facial features, and my hue. Go figure that one out. Nothing technically wrong here, and I like being able to record a message. The problem is this is entirely pointless. If we could give them to friends so they could dick with them on the dashboard. Hey that would be cool, but a game that is all about hitting something to hear a reply is just plain stupid, and a complete waste of time. Dare I say it, but Microsoft needs some version of Home for this stuff to have any minor entertainment value.
Build a Buddy. Yes the on stage demo is about all you get for this feature. It takes a physical object, turns it into a slug, and makes it go through rehearsed acts while you have to trigger it by waving, jumping, dancing, and spreading your arms. Seriously Microsoft you blew it with this one. You have a 3D rendered toy, and it just screams to be run around in a virtual environment. Maybe even interacting with other players toys. Give us a obstacle coarse or something. This would actually be fun. This isn't fun, and it isn't worth downloading.
I didn't even bother with Googly Eyes. Somehow I got the impression it was more of the same. Sparkler is not available yet, and neither is the virtual news set which I will be honest looks interesting. Let us run video behind that couch, and we might be able to go all MST3K on something. I doubt that however I am leaning towards something far more mundane. What it all amounts to is tech demos, and nothing more. So I went to the source to see if these labs may you know improve in the near future. My hopes were dashed. They are voting on more tech demos, and asking for feed back. Here is my feed back nobody should be downloading over a gigabytes worth of tech demos.
The least we should be getting is tools to try and make something for ourselves. Build a Buddy should be build a 3D platformer map for you and your friends. Kinect Me should be letting me create custom animations for my Avatar to use on the dashboard. Bobble Head should be what lets me place art on 3D objects to be used in games. Fine you can do these things I didn't need to see that. What I need to see is finished products that I can actually use. Why do I feel like I Just got used by Microsoft for no reason whatsoever.
Anyway it isn't worth seeing for yourselves. You saw it at E3, and that is all these labs actually do.
