Now I'm not a misogynist, but I'm no prude either. I'm willing to admit when things turn me on... okay sometimes with things turn me on. Anyway, these are the 10 video game outfits I think are the hottest, following 5 outfits that many say are sexy, but for various reasons, I don't.
Also, you might have to look some of these up. I'd post pictures, but like my fanfare list, I don't know of that many that would reliably stay around. Plus they shouldn't be too hard to find.
Top 5 Sexy Outfits I don't find sexy:
5. Rikku's theif outfit in FF X-2: Never was into Rikku in the first place, and this suit just looks weird to me instead of sexy anyway. Plus her hair and headband remind me of Captain Jack Sparrow (insert Johnny Depp androgyny joke here).
4. Bayonetta's outfit: First of all, never really got skintight outfits. Just not my thing. I know the outfit can make itself nude, but to me that's just trying too hard. Plus there are her infamous freakishly long legs, and her hairstyle is just weird.
3. Sheva's alternate ouftit in RE5: Some say it's a fur bikini, but it looks like animal print to me, and that's not something that turns me on either. Plus the tooth necklace makes me shake my head. I don't think the game is racist, just stupid, and this is not helping.
2. Samus's Zero Suit: Funny how much attention this is getting when it shows less skin than her best ending outfits in the first three games. Plus with how she got treated in some of the games since that got introduced, it annoys me more than anything.
1. Ivy's outfit in Soul Calibur IV: This is most certainly trying too hard. It's like the movie Showgirls, so desperate to turn you on, but also desperate to pretend it's not porn.
Top 10 Sexiest Outfits
10. Street Fighter II - Chun Li's dress: Okay, an elegant sexy outfit is more my thing, and Chun-Li's classic outfit fits that bill. Find the spiked bracelets a little weird, but the rest is nice.
9. Soul Calibur II - Cassandra's blue and white dress: Another elegant sexy outfit, just without something odd like the spiked bracelets. Nothing particularly enticing for me either (why it's just #9 here), but I like the overall look of this.
8. Onechanbara - Aya's outfit: Honestly, it's placing here because of the feather bikini. Nice. The cowboy hat and feather boa (at least when they are draped around the neck like that) just don't do anything for me.
7. Final Fantasy X-2 - Yuna's Gunslinger dress and Singer dress: Yeah, I just like the cut of these dresses. Too bad Yuna has the silly run. I do mean it looks silly. If she had walked a bit nicer, this would be higher on my list.
6. No More Heroes - Bad Girl's dress: Speaking of walking nicer, this is a major reason this outfit is on this list. It looks good on Bad Girl, and she looks good in it. Combine her sexy sashaying, and the way the skirt just bounces with her hip sways, and I have a save file just to fight that battle, and not even try to fight her, just get her to walk that way some more. If she's a playable character in another NMH game, I'm so there.
5. Soul Calibur IV/Broken Destiny - Amy's Dress: It's higher than Cassandra's dress frankly due to how the fur trim wraps around her low neckline and because she's a redhead. Although I like her white dress even better than the black on. Not too crazy about the boots, but whatever. The odd thing is that it looks even better in Broken Destiny. For some reason her outfits in IV look like they are a layer of black with just some fur shading and bump mapping for the fabric. It looks really "off". That is done in the PSP version, so looks much better there.
4. Battle Chess - Queen's gown (cover): Yeah, it's not in the actual game. I still like it. Heck, for all we know this is what the Queen wears when she and the king get it on, and she was nice enough to pose for a painting in it.
3. Resident Evil 4 - Ashley's second outfit: Yeah, her screaming is annoying. Yeah, let's get the "ballistics" jokes out of the way. I just like this outfit. It looks really good on her. Don't have much else to say about it. It's just my tastes, and they really favor this one.
2. Princess Maker 3 - Rabbit Princess: Now this is how you do a fur bikini. Too bad it's just shown in one of the ending screens. If this was properly rendered in a game, it would be my absolute number one.
1. Final Fantasy XIII - Vanille's oufit: I love, or at least really like, everything about this outfit. Okay, I agree with the blog "Go Make Me A Sandwich" that the pose in her primary picture is ridiculous. And I know that her characterization herself is the annoying "cheerful" girl. I just like the whole look of her anyway.
A flashy-first game is awesome when it comes out. A great-first game is awesome forever.
Plus, just for the hell of it: Kelly Brook at the 2008 BAFTAs
