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I think to much, if I would kill an enemy I would feel bad....'Maybe he had a wife';..'Maybe he had children, they will never forgive me'....' No happy holidays for those children and wife'....'  I could have shot him in his leg or arm';..'then he would have survived'....'Do I really deserve to life any longer;.;'...' I mean I killed someone'....' sigh'..

I rather gave money to charity or help with Charity;..just like last year I will be helping with an Brussels organization to have a Christmas evening with free food for all the people who live on the street...I think that makes me 100 times feel better than going to the military (again).