ah meant tae siy ah'll correct ye's if ye try tae speak scots an aw, tae the best ae mah abilities. some ae ye's are pyoor dafties but, so it micht no be possible tae git ye's aw up tae scratch. we'll see how it gaws fo.
i meant to say i'll correct you all if you try to speak scots as well, to the best of my abilities. some of you are total dafties though, so it might not be possible to get you all perfect. we'll see how it goes though
richt, lesson wan. the alphabet. ooh ye dancer!
A - ai as in "rain", which we git a lot ae
B - bee as in, "git tae fuck ye dirty B"
C - see as in, "see yoou next tuesday, ya dirty B"
D - dee as in, what the neds and delinquents git oan their Higher exams 
E - eee as in, "ye goat ony Es oan ye pal?"
F - eff as in, "its sae effin cauld oot here, ken?"
G - jee as in, "gee whiz, mary, that's bloody awfy, so it is."
H - aich/haich as in, "how dae ye spell "Edinburgh? is thur an aich oan thae end?" "aye, ya fudd"
I - aye as in, well actually we nivvur say "I". its aw aboot the "ah". "ah wiz pyoorlikat"
J- jay/jy as in, "ken that sports shoap - jy jy bee?" also known as a popular ned hang-out spot.
K - kay as in, kay. o.0
L - ell when a scot says a word like "well", the "ll" goes oan a fraction ae a secon longer an it should.
M - em as in, "emmmmm, ah'm no sure aboot at', lemme jist check..."
N - en a vital letter, used in "naw" and "nut". baith tae be meanin "no".
O - oh. no much tae say aboot this yin ah'm afraid.
P - pee as in, oh my gawd man i really need tae pee. ah'll be back the noo.
Q - "kwih" this wan's a bit fancy fur us, really.pronounced as in "Kwaliteeeee", a familiar ned battlecry.
R - rrrrrrrrrr haha, we kin dae this an maist ae yoou's cannae. its caw'd "rrrollin yer Rrrs". git it up ye.
S - ess sometimes heard at the fitba' wan the ba' gits past the dirty B in the goals.
T- tee as in, whit a golf ba' sits oan while ye admire the scenery at St. Andrews Golf Course.
U - yoou as in, "yoou dirty bastart! git back here the noo!"
V - vee as in, "ah gae hum the Vees an bolteed" "aw jock, ye're pure solid so ye are"
W - wih as in, "whit?" "whit are yoou oan aboot, ya fudd?"
X - ex as in "ah wiz talkin tae mah ex and ahwizpyoorlikat an he wiz aw like ohmygawd"
Y - why? why? ah havnae goat a scooby.
Z - zed. it's essential at we pronounce this wan as "zed". nane ae yer american "zee" pish. its jist no happenin'.
