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A better written MGS wouldn't be MGS. Half the fun is the overwritten cheesiness and the annoying exposition

Annoying Guy / provocative Girl: that's all because of the "gizmolicious thingie", Snake...

Snake: the gizmolicious thingie?

Annoying Guy / provocative Girl: yes, it was introduced by the watchacallit while trying to infiltrate the miltary-confectionery complex.

Snake: the watchacallit?

[sepia footage of the tower of Babel being built starts rolling] ...



"All you need in life is ignorance and confidence; then success is sure." - Mark Twain

"..." - Gordon Freeman