Sony:
200 dollar PS3 bundles, one featuring LittleBigPlanet and Ratchet and the other one with Killzone 2 and Metal Gear Solid 4.
5 bajillion trailers for games we all love.
A bunch of actors dressed up as famous Sony characters (Nathan Hale, Ratchet, Nariko, etc.)
The return of Crash, Spyro, and Ape Escape.
PSP, PS3, and neural connectivity, allowing you to play videogames with the power of your mind.
Nintendo:
New Mario game set in Italy. It tells the story of Mario's return to his home (forget the Mushroom Kingdom!).
Exciting new Nintendo merchandise, including plushies of the SSBB cast, Metroid-style arm cannons for the military, and karts for the kids.
A dance-off between all the Nintendo big-wigs. Reggie may be able to kick ass and take names, but can he serve it up on the dance floor? Featuring Miyamoto breakdancing!
Final Fantasy 6 remake for the Wii.
Nintendo ends up buying Apple and we can stop this stupid speculation about Apple entering the industry.
Microsoft:
They buy every major publisher in Japan (save for Nintendo) just for shits and giggles.
Opening of a new series of arcades, allowing for real-life Halo 3 styled matches of Capture the Flag and Grifball. Ages 13 and up.
A new trailer for Gears of War 3, finally explaining what happens to Dizzy.
Announces player moderators for Xbox Live, making certain well behaved players able to immediately moderate and take action on any morons online.
New 360 bundles, including Gears, Gears 2, a chainsaw gun, and some juice.
