A guy sits in his bar, his best mate next to him...
"Jim, maybe you can help. I've got this strange cramp in my arm all the time. It doesn't stop but, the doctor takes so much time so do you have any advice or treatment?"
Jim replies: "Well, I don't know what it is but, there is this new machine in the supermarket that can do diagnosisses if you hand it a bottle of your urine".
The man does as his friend advices him the next day. Upon placing a cup of urine in the machine, it trembles and creeks and out comes a note "You have a tennisarm. Just give it some rest and the pain ceases in 2 weeks".
The guy is amazed but instantly wonders how good this machine is. Just for kicks, He collects some muddy water from the washing machine, mixes it up with poo from his dog, collects some urinesamples from his daughter and his wife, and as the coup de grace wanks some additional ingredients in the cup.
He places the mixture in the machine and after a lot of creeking and trembling a note pop's out:
"Your washing machine has a calcium-leak, I suggest you get a mechanic. Your dog has wurms, get her to a vet. Your daughter apparantly uses her bong daily. Your wife is pregnant... but not from you and if you don't stop wanking that tennisarm is never going to be healed."
The Doctor will see you now
Promoting Lesbianism --> 
