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Snake would win.

First, he would sneak into the Chiefs house.

Then, he would use the facecamo to disguise himself as Jessica Alba.

Lastly, when Master Chief is getting naked, Snake would pull out his gun and calmly end the life of this so called Chief.

Snake wins.

And so does the Covenant



I hope my 360 doesn't RRoD
         "Suck my balls!" - Tag courtesy of Fkusmot