Thanks for the info, Snesboy. I'm not alone in these trenches.
@quigotcb, ask and you too shall recieve.
This story's not too wild. Anyway, in the military, the drill sergeants are dicks. Quite possibly, the biggest dicks in the world. Having one of them in your face probably the worst thing that could ever possibly happen to you. Aside from yelling at us for everything from making a bed that's not firm, to not having your shoelaces tight enough on your boots, they worked us like dogs from 4am until 6pm. And they made us drink water. Lots and lots of water.
I was just an 18 year old geek. I actually told my recruiter that if he bought me Super Metroid (That was 24 megs "old killer" is up against -I still remember the commercial!) I would enlist. -He didn't buy the game though. My mom did. Anyway, I had no place in this man's Airforce. I was a yes-man. I did anything to avoid having one of those Instructors in my face.
Early in the morning, the bugles (actually a recording of bugles) sounded. We had less than two minutes to be dressed and downstairs, and lined up. At that exact moment, my penis said "Lewis, you have 30 seconds to relieve me." "Sorry penis." I said. "Not this time. Work with me, and I promise I won't beat you later! Deal?"
No Deal. I was dressed and downstairs in "flight formation" when D21 jr. decided to show me who really ran things. I stayed at attention as long as I could, but there was no holding back the flood. That was the best piss ever! I stood there, sang the Air Force song in a pool of urine, and marched back upstairs like nothing had happened. While everyone else was cleaning the dorm for morning inspection, I was in the bathroom changing pants, trying to get piss out of my boots. Nobody ever said a word to me about the incident. The perfect crime? Somehow, I doubt it.
I really do tell you guys way too much about myself.
